South Park The Stick of Truth Review

Aliens, and farts, and abortions, oh my!!

*spoiler free*

Have you ever wished you could gallivant around valiantly assaulting your foes with a giant dildo named Black Lightning? Have you ever wanted to slay hordes of mutant aborted fetuses? Do you hate Jews and/or Gingers? If any of these things offend you then this is not the game for you. However if none of these strike a nerve and you wish to play a well crafted RPG with clever storylines and addicting gameplay, then this is exactly the game for you.

Let’s talk about the storylines for a second. The Stick of Truth loosely follows one of the original plot lines of the popular South Park TV series. You play as the new kid on the block exploring the city and making friends via a neighborhood larping game. Aliens visit earth. Kenny has a gender identity crisis. If you’re lucky you’ll find Jesus. But most importantly, you need to find out what the heck is taking so long to finish the construction of Taco Bell. The Stick of Truth is every bit of raunchy nonsense one would expect to see and hear from anything with “South Park” in the title. From fart jokes, to homosexual sex acts, vulgar language, and interactively performing an abortion on a grown man — yes, interactively performing an abortion on a grown man — this game has it all. And it is not for children.

     This game.

     Is not.

    For children.

(yup, this is my spawn)

If you are a parent and some how completely oblivious to what South Park is, do not under any circumstances let your mini-yous con you into buying them this videogame. Unless of course you’re ok with this sort of thing in which case, go for it.

Surprisingly, this game boasts more than just shock humor. Underneath the (almost overused) fart jokes and underwear-thieving gnomes is a very well-constructed JRPG. You start off creating a character from 1 of 4 unique classes(one of them being “Jew”). Combat consists of turn based attacks and defenses with each character wielding different weapons, attacks, and button combinations. Out of all the characters available to you, you can have any 2 active in combat at one time, consisting of your main character and one extra. (Two character battle parties?? Really?) Don’t despair, characters are also rotatable during combat so with a little strategy you have access to any and all skills and benefits you may need. Combat gameplay contains status effects, elemental damage, magic attacks, counter attacks, and some pretty hilarious smack talking.

The item/weapon system is simple yet effective. You have head gear, hand gear, torso gear, and leg gear, with hundreds of unique items and combinations. Some pieces of gear have special “slots” in them that allow you to augment them further with special abilities unique to your character and playstyle. Remember that aforementioned dildo? That wasn’t a joke. This weapon became one of my favorites after splicing it with bonus fire and nauseate damage. That’s right, I smacked my enemies with an oversized sex-toy until they threw up and burst into flame.

The mechanics in this game are absolutely flawless. It’s a small shame that such a great RPG is obscured beneath the stigma of being a South Park creation. It is easily one of the best RPGs produced 360 and PS3 both, yet I fear it will not get the recognition it rightfully deserves.

Pros: Great Sound effects/music. Hilarious jokes and commentary. Top-notch gameplay. Low learning curve. Very high-replayability.
Cons: The stigma surrounding the South Park brand will deter some people from a great game.